BACK IN COMMAND™

Go from feeling stuck, insecure, and steamrolled by other people’s demands to feeling confident, courageous, and more clear than ever.

A 12-week group coaching experience for whip-smart perfectionists, high-achievers & people-pleasers who refuse to second-guess themselves, yet again (...and are ready to take command of their day-to-day decisions, desires, and impossible dreams)

 

 “I was on the hedonistic treadmill for life…”

 

You're ambitious, you’re successful, and your career looks wildly impressive from the outside looking in.

BONUS: You’ve earned a sparkly gold star for living the life you always thought you wanted…

So why does something still feel off?

Maybe you’re burnt out from years *ahem* I mean decades running on the treadmill – with no break to tie your shoe (seriously, TIE YOUR FUCKING SHOE!), drink some water, or even ask, “Why the hell am I on this treadmill in the first place?”

Maybe you’re always. so. damn. hard. on yourself. And the crew of critical voices in your head won’t shut the hell up – even for a minute.

Maybe your friends tell you that you’re a total badass, but you NEVER believe the hype. You worry you’re not as good as they think and you’re going to get found out. You might even block out the compliments completely.

Maybe you feel like your own (worst) babysitter – constantly seeking permission and confining yourself to a small-yet-safe playroom – with limited exploration, adventure, or anything sorta-maybe-probably risky.

Maybe you’re tired of earning stack upon stack of gold stars because constantly striving to be a “good student” no longer energizes you. And it certainly doesn’t make you happy the way it did when you were a kid.

Maybe you find yourself wondering…

Is this the life I’m supposed to be living?

Or is there something else out there waiting for me?

 

You’re in the right room if you prioritize everyone else’s needs before your own, including your own joy and happiness...

 

And you’re ALSO in the right room if you’re the type of woman who ends up pushing your dreams, fun & even self-care activities off your to-do list and onto your “Maybe Another Day” list (which is basically “code” for the black hole where desires go to die a miserable death).

And listen to this 👉 When we take ownership of what we want and go after it, we (that’s you and me, my friend) have the power to change the world.

I know this feels hard right now - like the world is going in the wrong direction. 

But if we can achieve more female leadership on EVERY level - from PTAs to boardrooms to politics - there is an energy and a brilliance that women bring that our world is longing for.  

And yes - there is a patriarchal system that we have been up against for years. But the other obstacle? It’s us. We are great at many things, including getting in our own damn way.

THE GOOD NEWS?

You can choose to write your wildest dreams and desires in BIG, bold letters at the top of your to-do list. You can choose to prioritize your shit over everyone else’s. You can choose to live a life where you give zero shits. Or you can choose to live a life where you give ALL THE SHITS about the things that actually matter to YOU.

You can choose yourself. FULL STOP.

 
 

You can choose to be

BACK IN COMMAND™

And you can choose it today. I can help.

 

BACK IN COMMAND™ is a 12-week interactive group coaching experience for whip-smart perfectionists, high-achievers & people-pleasers who want to determine what success looks like NOW - and create a plan to go after it. Because success should FEEL as good is it looks.

 

It doesn’t matter if you’re on a more traditional path toward the C-suite or a partner in a law firm or if you’re a creative in the writer’s room, an entrepreneur building something from the ground up, a non-profit leader or an executive producer at an advertising production company.

In other words, it’s not about your title or whether you’re climbing the corporate ladder or living the life of a multi-passionate entrepreneur…

If you’re a go-getter who’s burnt yourself out more times than you can count, and you’re ready to tap into the courage and conviction you need to continue going after what you want even when it gets hard, then THIS is the room for you.

 
 

Imagine what it would feel like to ask for the things you need – sans martyr vibes

 

Imagine what it would feel like to finally:

  • Trust yourself instead of worrying about what everyone else thinks.

  • Step into a private room filled with powerhouse women who’ve got your back and are battling the same broken system and archaic storylines sponsored by a little thing called The Patriarchy. Together, we’ll call out what’s real and what’s a straight-up lie stemming from thousands of years of socialization in a patriarchal society.

  • Trust your body, your inner knowing, and the most pure, unadulterated part of your soul that knows what you want – what you really want – because you finally quiet down enough to truly LISTEN.

  • Say HELL NO! to all the soul-sucking requests thrown your way.

  • Quit dimming your own light (it’s LED, turn it up!) and playing sidekick to everyone else. Together, we’ll identify what sets you apart from all the rest of ‘em so you can illuminate your voice, vision, and values like you’re a GD Broadway show.

  • Stride into any room with command over yourself, your life, and your viewpoints. All from a curious place of compassion and creativity. Your confidence radiates from your core. And you don’t question it. Not any more.

When you’re BACK IN COMMAND™, you have the structure & tools, coaching, and community you need to remember there’s more to this life than survival. You can thrive. You can feel fulfilled, successful, and believe in yourself. You don’t have to grind it out day after day.

So whether you have an idea that you’ve been thinking about but can’t seem to convince yourself to get off the ground. Or you want to lean into your brilliant, authentic voice and take ownership of the things that really make you YOU. Or you want to feel more confidence to ask for the promotion, this program is designed to help you create a roadmap to get you started and feel confident about it.

This is your chance to…

 Show up bigger, braver & bolder in the world.

This experience was “exactly what I needed at this time in my life.”

  • Access incredible tools...

    “I gained so much awareness and learned that a thought doesn’t have to rule you. I also got incredible tools for dealing with life: setting goals, dreaming bigger, and figuring out my values.”

    - E.B., Marketing Associate

  • Connect with new friends like Danielle...

    “I love the community! It’s somehow comforting to know that others are also on their journey and struggling in different areas. We all benefit from hearing how you coach the others in the group.”

    - Danielle Aventejado

    Artist

  • Set big goals and continue to grow like Ghia...

    “Being a part of this group has really helped me through the past few months that – without a doubt – have been the hardest of my life. I’m so grateful for the tools you have opened me up to. I want to continue to grow, set big goals and work hard to achieve them.”

    - Ghia Godfree
    Writer

  • Determine exactly what you want & build the confidence to go after it…

    “Before I joined BACK IN COMMAND, I was feeling lost, alone and disconnected with a lot of anxiety and stress. Now I feel so much more confident. I’m setting boundaries with people. And I started a new job that feels aligned with my values and what I want next for my life.”

    -A.C.

So ummm what exactly is
BACK IN COMMAND™?

BACK IN COMMAND™ is not about changing who you are — It's about owning every facet of your identity.

Together, we’ll walk through six phases designed to help you get clear about what’s most important to you now, break old habits that are no longer serving you, build momentum, and exercise your courage - which will inevitably lead to more confidence in everything that you do.

The first part of BACK IN COMMAND™ is the curriculum. These are the practical tools and strategies that for some bizarre reason, no one teaches us in school as kids. Here’s what it looks like:

  • The first module is all about what you really want for your life. And I’m not interested in the watered-down version. You’ll discover the high octane, I-freaking-love-my-life-and-I-don’t-care-what-anyone-else-thinks version. We’ll start with your vision for your life because you can’t achieve something that you can’t articulate.

    So many of us are running around with the shoulds and the old ideas of who we are and what we wanted at one point. But what do you want NOW? I’ll ask you the (often surprising) questions that will help you to go deeper with yourself, explore what your special sauce is and determine what success looks like to you NOW.

  • I’ll teach you my most valuable tool, The Pause, and you’ll learn how to listen to ALL the voices in your head as you tell yourself a never-ending number of stories about your day-to-day progress.

    You’ll hear how you talk to yourself when you start to dream bigger. WARNING: It probably won’t be pretty. That’s ok – we’re in this together.

    You’ll hear those voices loud and clear and learn how to identify your inner critic. ←The biggest bully of the bunch. You’ll finally learn the tools you need to work with the inner critic so that voice doesn’t run your life anymore. And once you start to recognize your inner critics (yes, there’s often more than one) for who they are, you’ll surprise them *and yourself!* by taking bold action – even when they tell you that you can’t or shouldn’t.

    When we’re done, you’ll have an entirely new relationship with your imposter syndrome and voice of self doubt. Plus we’ll deep dive into your capacity for self-compassion. Because science says that self-compassion strengthens your resilience, lessens anxiety, and allows you to be less judgmental and more compassionate towards others as well. All human beings have thoughts and feelings... Let’s find out what happens when you stop making those thoughts and feelings the truth and start recognizing them as information to help you make choices aligned with who you want to be in the world.

  • Most of us stop paying attention to our gut instincts at a very young age for multiple reasons - adults (unintentionally) tell us not to trust ourselves. But now YOU’RE the adult and that gut instinct might not be as strong as it was, but it’s SUPER wise. Your inner wisdom is an untapped resource. We’ll do some work to reconnect and strengthen that muscle so you can call upon it whenever you want. Because NO ONE knows what’s best for you better than you.

    Together, we’ll cultivate your voice of inner wisdom, so you stop looking outside of yourself for the answers.

  • We’ll start with an in-depth Values Assessment to see what’s working and what’s not. This will give you a clear vision of where the gaps are on your path to feeling fulfilled. From here we can create a roadmap to help you close those gaps between your actions and your values. This will allow you to stop worrying about what other people think because you KNOW that you’re doing what’s best for you.

  • Every time you say yes to something you don’t want to, you’re saying NO to something that’s important to you. Often, that something is yourself, your needs and your wants. And heads up - this isn’t just about boundaries with other people.

    So this is where we’ll get into saying no, setting boundaries, excellence over perfection, and practical strategies to fight your good girl and good student tendencies.

  • Is it better to be stagnant and successful than to try something and fail?

    Together, we’ll explore why failure ISN’T a bad word. I'll give you the Science Experiment Strategy and you’ll commit to some messy action you can take to go after the thing you truly want.

 

What you can expect inside this coaching experience…

 

✓ Curriculum: SIX 90-Minute LIVE workshops

We’ll explore, visualize, and dig into your values, viewpoints, and the voices in your head – using a variety of tools and frameworks.

Then you’ll have a week to integrate - to try new things, explore the tools and the exercises that you’ve learned, and notice what comes up for you.

✓ Coaching: SIX 90 minute HOT SEAT SESSIONS

I want to make sure you have all the support you need as you learn how to use these new tools in your every day life so during each of the integration weeks, you’ll have access to 90 minutes of hot-seat coaching. Former participants are always blown away by how much they learn from simply watching each other get coached. So whether you have something you want support with or you just want to observe, this is where the real magic happens

✓ COMMUNITY: ROUND TABLE CONVERSATIONs

After you learn a new concept, we’ll spend some time having a round table discussion inside the community about that week’s topic. You can share if you want or you can simply listen. 

This is an opportunity to connect to the brilliant women in this group and to realize how NOT ALONE you are in this process. 

And of course there will be a private community slack channel. Consider this your new mastermind inner circle. You’ll have direct access to me for questions, spot coaching and of course, accountability.

And in case you’re one of those people that hates groups, listen up.

When you do something in a group, you increase the likelihood that you’ll succeed by 80%. Book clubs. Gym classes. Health programs. They create accountability and community and structure. So if you say you’re going to do something and you try to do it alone, the likelihood that you’ll ACTUALLY do it is 10%. 

But if you do it in a group, you increase the likelihood that you’ll actually do it to 90%. BAM.

plusthese added bonuses:

✓ Journal prompts to help you explore along the way

It’s time for you to take the time to reflect and get really clear. The questions I ask you to reflect on between sessions will make that possible.

✓ my private client questionnaire

Private clients say this is worth the cost of their first month of coaching alone. These questions will help you to get to know yourself fast so when it’s time to begin the program, you can hit the ground running. 

✓ A New year round table coffee chat

We’ll kick off 2024 with cultivating connection with your new mastermind community. We’ll get to know each other, talk about where you want to build momentum, what feels in the way, and what each of you hope to get out of our time together. 

 

Who is perfect for BACK IN COMMAND™?

This tectonic-shifting experience is perfect for you if you’re whip-smart and tenacious... You’re a people-person – and your ability to see the good in others and to champion their desires and success is otherworldly.

You have tremendous drive and you know in your gut that you are meant to make your mark on this world.

You want to do big things like…

  • Start your own business – the one you’ve dreamed of for years, or…

  • Break rules, re-write those rules, and shift the culture in your company, or…

  • Speak up about the issues you care about, battle inequities and injustices in our system, and maybe even run for local office, or…

  • Grow into the leadership position that you know you’re meant for, or…

  • Write the novel, direct the play, produce the movie, create the art…DO THE THING that you’ve been thinking about for years…

 

You, my friend, aren’t interested in living a passive life.

And you’re not interested in living an inauthentic life that feels incongruent with your values. Life’s too short. You’ve felt the brevity of our time over the pandemic. You don’t have time to waste. Not anymore.

You want adventures and relationships that feed your soul –

experiences that are fun and filled with laughter. Work that has a purpose. You demand reciprocity because you’re done giving everything you’ve got with little to no return on your energetic & emotional investment.

 

BACK IN COMMAND™ is designed to help you break old thought patterns & stories that no longer serve you…

Your thoughts create the architecture of your world. And you have way more control over what you think than you may realize. You’ll discover how to become more aware of the voices in your head so you can identify the negative ones and shift the way you react. So you can stop spoon-feeding yourself BS stories that no longer serve the life you want to lead. You’ll be less reactive and more resilient.

 

With Back in Command™ in your back pocket, you could also:

Love yourself for your strengths, weaknesses, and ALL the quirkiness that is you.

Before you get all eye-rolley on me, admit it. You are a royal bitch to yourself. You would never DREAM of speaking to other people the way you talk to yourself. Would you? And here’s the thing – no one is ever gonna love you more than you love you. So it’s time for you to stop rolling your eyes and recognize that self compassion is the key to everything you want in life. It starts with treating yourself to sleep, a spa treatment, vacay on the beach, kindness. It all starts with kindness. Toward yourself.

 
 

Stop letting everyone steamroll you.

Your anxiety over what everyone thinks is NOT your fault. Not even close. This fear of failing others has been ingrained in us as women for centuries. But it’s time to change the narrative because let’s face it: people-pleasing ain’t working. It’s causing you (and many, many other women) to rage with resentment. And while that rage is justified, it’s dimming your light and preventing you from building authentic relationships. Also, it’s fucking exhausting.

 
 

Create some profound changes in your life.

When you get clear about what you want AND what’s holding you back, you also get to make the choices to move forward in a different way. There’s no more time for excuses – we’re here to help you bring your magic to the world.

 
 

Back in Command™ will not solve all of your problems overnight…

Sorry, Charlie. This is not a quick fix. Changing your life takes consistent work because you’re rewiring your brain muscles. Consider this a mental workout. You wouldn’t go to the gym once a week and expect to build major muscles, right? Your brain isn’t any different. If you want results, you’ll have to work at it. It’s simple, but it’s NOT easy. The cool part? You’ll have a community of women by your side for support, and access to me on group coaching calls and in the private community to make sure you don’t give up on yourself.

 

Back in Command™ will not:

Work by osmosis.

You gotta show up and do the work. Period. What you get out of this program (or ANY coaching program, for that matter) happens IN BETWEEN the actual coaching. So just commit – you’re worth it.

 
 

Deliver ALL the answers you’re seeking with a big, fat bow.

As much as I might hate to admit it, I do NOT have all the answers. At the end of the day, the only person who really knows what’s best for you… is YOU! But I do have an endless number of questions designed to help you gain clarity and intention about your thoughts, decisions, and actions. You’ll walk away from this program with a deep connection to your values and your intuition – similar to what you felt when you were a four-year-old – before you stopped listening.

 
 

Transform your life into a fairytale in only 12 weeks.

This program is the beginning of your journey, and the exploration doesn’t end after our time ends in this program. But you’ll gain tools you could use ‘til the day you’re 102 years old. These tools aren’t trendy – they’re timeless. If you’re ready to invest in tested tools that could help you take command of your day-to-day decisions, desires, and impossible dreams, this program is for you.

 

You may be thinking, “Michelle, how do you know so much about all this?”

WELL, MY FRIEND, I WAS YOU…

 

“That’s just the way I am.” ← I hear that from people all the time.

I call bullshit.

Did you know that your brain is actually malleable into your 90s? Yup. You actually have the capacity to change the way you think pretty much until the day you die.

 
 

So “that’s just the way I am” is not the truth. I know this from firsthand experience.

 
 

When I was 24, I started seeing a therapist. I was a dancer and I had all sorts of body image issues and I FINALLY hit a wall. I was exhausted - from obsessing about my body, from obsessing about every calorie I ate, from having the way I felt about my body dictate the way I felt about my entire life. I was just. plain. tired.

Every time I went to eat, I had the same negative thoughts that ran through my mind: You shouldn’t eat that. You’re gonna get fat. You’re gonna get fatter. Why can’t you control yourself? WHAT’S WRONG WITH YOU? I would listen to those thoughts and instead of just having the Oreo, I would eat some carrots. But I wouldn’t feel satisfied. So then I would eat some almonds. Still not satisfied.

And on and on until I broke down and not only did I eat the Oreo, but I ate the entire bag.

Then I would sit there hating myself because not only did I feel completely sick to my stomach, but I would also tell myself that I was weak and getting fatter by the Oreo. Sounds like a delightful time – doesn’t it?

The technical term for my disorder is obsessive compulsive eating. My term was just BIG fat failure.

I did a lot of work with my therapist to uncover what was underneath my relationship with my body and with food. (I’m sure you already know that it had very little to do with the food and a lot more to do with learned behaviors and thought patterns -- many of which are societal.) In order for me to change my behavior, I needed to change the way I thought about food. So she gave me a simple mantra…

The mantra required that I slow down so that I actually got conscious about what I wanted and what I was doing rather than running on automatic the way I had been for so many years. Eventually, I needed the mantra less and less.

It took me three years before the day I realized that I was just eating – whether it was a salad or a Snickers bar. Three years later, I had changed my entire way of thinking about food, I felt good in my body (not because of what I weighed but because I was ACTUALLY CONNECTED TO MY BODY), and I dealt with my emotions without eating them. I had completely changed my life.

By shifting that one thought pattern, I changed my life.

So why am I telling you this story of my obsessive compulsive eating disorder? Because. You could have a similar struggle somewhere in your life…

Think about how much energy you spend worrying about what others will think, wondering if the decision you’re about to make is the right one, holding back from expressing who you really are for fear that you’ll look stupid or be judged. That is NOT who you are. That’s how you behave. And you can change how you behave when you change your mind.

 
 

Whatever cycle or thought patterns you’ve got going, they’re changeable. It isn’t easy, but it’s simple. And it can change your life.

 
 

What started out as a journey to improve MY life has turned into a deep desire and passion to help other women stop second-guessing themselves, get more courageous and own their talent and value in the world so that we can take command of our lives, change the conversation around female leadership… and change the world.

I can help.

 

MEET A FEW OF MY CLIENTS…

Do I walk my talk?

Find out for yourself…

Group Testimonials

“Michelle asks the right questions. I felt like she really got to know me. She’s a gifted listener. And her intuition always leads us down an important path.”

— Rosa Lee

Associate Medical Professor at CUNY School of Medicine

“Michelle’s superpower is being an empath... She has an uncanny ability to ask the right questions so you can get to the resolution and take action.”

— Partner

Am Law 100 Law Firm

“It’s rare to find a straight-shooter like Michelle in Hollywood. She’s honest and direct. She won’t let you get away with any bullshit.”

— Wendy Mericle

Writer, Executive Producer & Showrunner

It’s time to stop playing small so you can make those around you more comfortable…

Are you ready to own your values, voice, and viewpoints?

I mean… You’re still here.

I’d say the answer is a BIG, FAT, FREAKING YES!

Frequently Asked Questions

F-Avenue-Q

  • A: Every other week, there will be 90 minutes of hot seat coaching time. I'll also pop into the Slack channel to answer questions consistently. If something comes up and you're really struggling, you also have access to me for a 1:1 session at a discounted rate while you're participating in Back in Command™.

  • A: Yes! All sessions are recorded and you’ll have access to them and any related materials later that day.

  • A: Absolutely! This is a great foundational course if you’re coaching-curious but not ready to dive in headfirst. I also work with clients 1:1 and in small groups. Often, people join my small group coaching after completing Back in Command™. You can also book me to do a workshop for your company or speak at your next event.

  • A: Listen, the whole point of this program is about learning to trust yourself and committing to the changes you want to make. It’s about playing full out. I can’t tell you the number of coaching clients who start to see changes in their lives from the moment they say “yes” to themselves. So…make it a hell yes or a hell no, my friend. There are no refunds. If you’re in, you’re in. Trust you’re going to get exactly what you need from the experience.

  • Therapy looks to your past while coaching really focuses on the present and into the future to support you in getting from where you are to where you WANT to be. It often feels “therapeutic”, but coaching is not therapy.

    A coach holds up a mirror to the client. Coaching is active. As a coach, I hold on to your goals and dreams even when that's hard for you. I have a way of hearing and seeing things that are hard for you to see for yourself. And I help you design actions to break down the limiting beliefs you’ve held about yourself so you can take things to the next level.

    Coaching and therapy really support each other and they are often done simultaneously.

  • Great question. First, I want to make it clear that I'm not a man hater. So many people equate "Fuck the patriarchy" with "Men suck" and that's not the perspective I'm coming from AT ALL. I believe men are victims (although I hate that word) of our patriarchal society, too. Although, you could argue that society still benefits them more.

    Patriarchy is defined as a society, system, or group in which men dominate women and have the power and authority. And until very recently, this is how our society lived. Men are expected to be the breadwinners and support the family. They are expected to be strong and logical and unemotional.

    Women are expected to be nurturing and take care of everyone else's needs. For many years, that was their currency because they couldn't have bank accounts or credit cards. They didn't have voting rights. They couldn't own property. They weren't allowed to be independent. They were expected to be emotional and dependent and weak – both physically and in demeanor.

    While we have shifted these roles in theory, women still carry the DNA of their ancestors. Women tend to lean toward people-pleasing because pleasing others was their only currency for so many years. We were designed to make sure that others were happy because that was how we survived. It takes awareness and years of hard work to shift that DNA.

    Also, men still have patriarchal shit in their DNA as well. They still feel pressured to be the breadwinners and to appear strong.

    So what do we do about it? We buck our patriarchal society by embracing a balance of the masculine AND feminine. In ALL of us. It's yin and yang. Women can be strong and powerful and sensitive and feminine. Men can be sensitive and big-hearted and vulnerable AND masculine.

    How do women look at some of the ways that men have led that feed INTO patriarchal society and buck those trends? And what have we seen and experienced in male leadership that we want to lean into? What have we seen and experienced that we want to avoid? These are questions we’ll explore in this program, together.

    We're not working toward making women act and operate more like men. We're working toward men and women becoming WHOLE people (←credit to therapist Terry Real for dropping this gold on the interwebs).

    We stop looking at traditional roles… We question how and when we're following old patterns that ultimately support the way it's always been rather than creating a new path forward.

    And THAT’S why we talk about The Patriarchy, my friend.