Is being in command a bad thing?
An important question for you...
… what comes to mind when I say the word “command”?
If you're like so many women I know (including myself!) it's probably someone - often of the male persuasion - who is domineering, controlling and constantly flaunting their power over other people.
Or it could be someone telling you what to do in a way that feels like it's not a choice.
Maybe it's an army sergeant barking orders that you feel like you have to “obey”.
I'm going to guess that, regardless of what you imagined, you didn't imagine…yourself.
But what if it was about being in command of yourself? Of every room you step into. Of YOUR DESTINY.
What if command was about you looking INSIDE of yourself for the answers rather than for external validation?
As women, we have been socialized to look outside of ourselves for validation and to make decisions about our lives. And what happens as a result? We stop trusting ourselves and our instincts. We do what other people think is best for us rather than trusting that we know what's best for ourselves.
And this cycle?
It slowly but surely erodes our confidence.
That was me 15 years ago.
I was in a job I wasn't that happy in, working toward a goal that I wasn't sure I even wanted to achieve, wondering if this was all there is to life…
So I started to explore.
Do you know how many “ideas” I had before I actually took the plunge and became a coach?
I can't even tell you - but my friends and family probably can. Because I asked for their opinion on most of them. I was going to be a yoga teacher. A makeup artist.
An interior designer. Go back to school to get my masters. I had multiple business ideas and multiple book ideas.
And when I wasn't actually asking for their opinion, I was still sharing the idea and waiting for them to approve of it…
It got to the point where I was actually embarrassed to share my new ideas because I hadn't followed through on a single one of the 35 that had come before it. I questioned myself. I listened to what everyone else thought…and the people who told me it would never work or had ten thousand questions ALWAYS held more weight than the people that told me it was a great idea.
I had so many freaking opinions swirling around my brain that I didn't even KNOW what I thought anymore!
All I knew was that I wanted that approval.
Because identifying as a woman often comes with looking for validation outside of ourselves.
We want someone else to give us their approval - whether it's a parent or a mentor or a friend that we deem more successful.
Interestingly enough, I didn't tell very many people when I decided to go take a coaching class. I was pretty sure they would all roll their eyes at me like this was just another one of my ideas that I would never follow through on and I was afraid that would get inside my head. I didn't want anyone else's opinion. I could feel that this was something I needed to try. Somehow I got back in command of myself and my dreams.
I'm guessing you might be able to relate.
Are you waiting for someone to tell you that your idea - no matter how big or small - is a good one?
Are you waiting for someone else to tell you that it's ok to say no?
Are you waiting for someone else to validate the way you parent?
Or your choice to stay home with your kids?
Are you sitting on an idea that you are CERTAIN will make a huge difference for your company - but you're worried about what everyone else might think of you?
If you answered yes to any of these questions, if you're constantly looking outside of yourself for someone to tell you that you're making the right choices for YOUR life, I want to invite you to join me inside BACK IN COMMAND.
BACK IN COMMAND is a 6 week group coaching experience for highly ambitious whip-smart perfectionists, over-achievers & people-pleasers where you'll learn to go from feeling stuck, insecure, and steamrolled by other people's demands to feeling confident, courageous, and clearer than ever.
READ MORE ABOUT BACK IN COMMAND™
When you're BACK IN COMMAND™, you have the structure & tools, coaching, and community you need to remember there's more to this life than survival. You can thrive. You can feel fulfilled, successful, and believe in yourself. You don't have to grind it out day after day. This is your chance to show up bigger, braver & bolder in the world.
Because as women, we have got to stop looking to everyone else to validate us.
Here's some of what you'll get out of this experience:
Stop endlessly looking for validation from others. (You'll build your own confidence and you'll start trusting yourself to make decisions and moves that are right for you.)
Learn to stop people-pleasing and focus on what's really important to you. (Whether it's things like determining if you want to stay in your job or saying “no” without second guessing yourself)
Get clear about what you really want NOW (and discover the root of what's in the way…because if you keep “fixing” something and it doesn't stay fixed, you're not fixing the right thing…you're just putting a band-aid on it)
Sooo…whaddya say? Are you ready to be BACK IN COMMAND?
I'd love to see you inside.